Getting Started with Therapy: 5 Tips for Starting Strong
Estimated Reading Time: 10–12 Minutes
Introduction
Growing up, the first thing I ever tried to get better at was Karate. I took classes every week. One day, I overheard my instructor telling a parent, “Some kids don’t get anything out of this.” I was shocked. I thought showing up to class was enough.
Turns out, it wasn’t. And it isn’t in therapy either. Therapy, like Karate, is a skill. And just like in martial arts, showing up is certainly important. But, what matters even more is the way you show up – and what you do before, during, and after sessions. This article is about getting started with therapy the right way so that you can get the best results. Below are 5 practical tips to help you start therapy on the right foot.1. Know what you want to get out of therapy
Getting started with therapy means taking some time to create a basic plan:
What problem are you wanting to solve?
What will be different in your life when you achieve your goal?
What will you be doing differently?
What will you no longer be doing?
- How might you be thinking differently?
You don’t have to have a perfect answer to these questions. But, do think about what you want before you start therapy. A clear vision not only accelerates your progress, it gives you something concrete to measure over time.
Also, expect your goals to shift as therapy progresses. That’s normal. The point isn’t to lock into one rigid outcome—it’s to stay intentional and accountable.
2. Make Sure You Have Bandwidth for Therapy
Getting started with therapy might only take up one hour a week on your calendar, but the real work happens between sessions. Plan for an additional hour per week for journaling, practicing skills, homework, or reflection.
Logistics to consider:
Commute: Add time if you’re seeing someone in person.
Cost: Expect $150–200/session unless using insurance or a sliding scale.
Emotional energy: Therapy is emotionally demanding. If you’re already maxed out, now might not be the best time to start (unless you’re in a crisis, of course).
Before getting started with therapy, ask yourself: “Can I show up weekly with focus, time, and emotional energy?” If the answer is yes, you’re ready. If not, don’t worry—it’s okay to wait until you are.
3. Choose the Right Therapist and Approach
Psychologist George Stricker has written extensively about client–therapist collaboration. He writes that in real estate, it’s all about: “Location, location, location.”
But in therapy, it’s: “Relationship, relationship, relationship.”
Psychologist and researcher Bruce Wampold, one of the leading figures in psychotherapy outcome research, notes that the therapeutic relationship is the single strongest predictor of success. That means that the quality of your therapeutic relationship will be the strongest factor in your results.
Don’t choose your therapist just because:
They accept your insurance.
They have great Google reviews.
Their office is close to work.
Instead, ask yourself:
Do I feel heard, safe, and respected in this person’s presence?
Do they invite collaboration?
Does their story or approach resonate with me?
Also, ask them directly: “What type of therapy do you do? What’s my role in this approach?” Learn the basic premise of the therapy, whether it’s CBT, gestalt, hypnotherapy, or another model. Knowing this helps you be a more empowered client getting started with therapy.
4. Set Yourself Up Logistically
Consistency is key in therapy. Weekly sessions are the gold standard. Anything less may stall your momentum.
Ask yourself:
Can I schedule the same day/time each week?
Can I protect this time from conflicts or distractions?
If virtual:
Use a private, quiet space
Use headphones and have a stable internet connection
Silence notifications
Block time before/after to reflect
Therapy is a professional service. Even in virtual sessions, show up focused, dressed appropriately, and ready to do important work.
5. Understand that Therapy is a Commitment, Not a Quick Fix
Some people come to therapy hoping to feel better right away. They want to feel relief quickly, and they assume a few sessions will do the trick. That’s understandable—therapy is an investment of time, money, and energy. But real, lasting change rarely happens overnight.
Therapy isn’t a quick fix. It’s a process of growth—and growth takes time. There will be moments of insight, yes, but those insights only create lasting change when followed by action and repetition. As you build new habits, regulate emotions differently, and shift beliefs about yourself and the world, you may not see results immediately. That doesn’t mean therapy isn’t working.
Research by Swift and Greenberg shows that around 20% of therapy clients drop out after a single session. Often, this is because they expect big changes too soon and get discouraged when they don’t happen right away.
This is where the Stages of Change model (by Prochaska and colleagues) can help. It outlines five phases that can help you understand where you are in the change process. As you can see from the model below, you can be moving through the change process, but not yet see tangible results. That’s because such results usually don’t happen until the action phase. However, all stages are equally important.
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Pre-contemplation: You don’t think you have a problem.
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Contemplation: You recognize a problem, but your motivation to change might be small
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Preparation: You start planning for change.
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Action: You take meaningful steps forward.
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Maintenance: You work to sustain your new patterns.
Therapy helps you move through these stages, and no matter where you begin, it takes commitment. Even if you’re starting in the “action” phase, progress won’t always be linear. Therapy requires showing up, being honest, trying new things, and revisiting old patterns more than once.
The goal is not instant transformation—it’s sustainable change over time. The clients who get the most out of therapy are those who stick with the process and trust it to unfold. This is the mindset you need when getting started with therapy.
Next Up: Making Therapy Work
Once you’re getting started with therapy, the next step is knowing how to use each therapy session to your advantage. In Part 2, we’ll walk through strategies that help you get the most out of every single hour—from building momentum to optimizing your time in session.
References
Prochaska, J. O., Norcross, J. C., & DiClemente, C. C. (1994). Changing for good: The revolutionary program that explains the six stages of change and teaches you how to free yourself from bad habits. William Morrow Paperbacks.
Stricker, G. (2010). Psychotherapy Integration. American Psychological Association.
Swift, J. K., & Greenberg, R. P. (2012). Premature discontinuation in adult psychotherapy: A meta-analysis. Journal of Consulting and Clinical Psychology, 80(4), 547–559. https://doi.org/10.1037/a0028226
Wampold, B. E. (2019). The Basics of Psychotherapy: An Introduction to Theory and Practice. American Psychological Association.
This article was human-authored and supported by AI tools for formatting, editing, and visual enhancement.
